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On this episode of Suburban Burnout, Megan and Laura discuss the profound effects of social media on the mental well-being of today's youth. Drawing inspiration from a thought-provoking discussion on the Joe Rogan Experience featuring Jonathan Haidt, a renowned social psychologist and author of The Anxious Generation, they explore four essential social norms that parents can establish to reshape the mental health trajectory of our children. Like frogs in a cooking pot, we excitedly jumped into the technology waters 15 years ago and slowly things have been heating up. Our children are being raised in a society addicted to smartphones and social media.
Reflecting on their upbringing, Megan and Laura reminisce about a time when technology played a minimal role in their lives. They highlight a crucial distinction: earlier generations had the opportunity to nurture their prefrontal cortex before the advent of social media. This region of the brain, responsible for executive functioning, was cultivated through imaginative play and moments of boredom that fostered creativity and problem-solving skills—luxuries increasingly scarce in today's digital landscape.
The allure of technology has changed childhood significantly. Kids now fill their free time with TikTok, YouTube, and IG reels. With teenagers spending an average of nine hours daily glued to their screens, face-to-face interactions are dwindling, giving way to a virtual existence. Pervasive screen time inhibits social development and deprives them of opportunities for personal growth. Megan and Laura underline the staggering opportunity cost: in those nine hours, youths could enhance their talents, acquire new skills, or explore passions beyond the digital domain.
Yet, the dangers lurking in cyberspace cast a shadow over this digital immersion. Online predators, catfishers, and drug peddlers exploit the vulnerabilities of unsuspecting children, blurring the lines between safety and risk. Paradoxically, the perceived safety of home—where children often find solace behind their screens—may harbor unseen threats far more insidious than those encountered in the physical world.
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Smartphone and social media addiction has caused a surge of mental health challenges among today's youth. Since the normalization of social media in 2010, rates of anxiety, depression, and ADHD have skyrocketed, highlighting the impact of our digital dependency.
Jonathan Haidt recommends four new social norms to curb smartphone addiction and promote better mental health among kids and teens:
No Smart Phones Until High School: If your child needs a phone, consider sleek alternatives that allow calling and texting and include basic apps like a calculator and calendar. These alternatives lack internet access and social media capabilities, helping to reduce distractions and dependency. (See link below)
No Social Media Before Age 16: A study published in the American Journal of Epidemiology found that higher social media use correlated with declines in mental and physical health and life satisfaction among a sample of 5,000 people. Before allowing your kids access to social media, consider watching The Social Dilemma with them to understand the risks.
Phone-Free Schools: Some school districts are implementing phone-free policies, which allow students to focus more on academics and engage more socially.
More Unstructured, Unsupervised Play and Responsibility: Encourage your child to be creative and explore the world independently. As they grow older, gradually give them more responsibilities to foster a sense of ownership and problem-solving skills.
Wait Until 8th Movement: The Wait Until 8th pledge empowers parents to delay giving their children smartphones until at least the end of 8th grade to protect them from inherent dangers and reduce the pressure to have a phone at an early age. Currently, the average age for a child’s first smartphone is ten years old, but this can change with parental intervention.
Why Wait? There are good reasons why top Silicon Valley executives delay giving smartphones to their children until at least age 14 (see Why Wait?):
Smartphones are addictive
Smartphones are an academic distraction
Excessive smartphone use alters a child's brain
Smartphones impair slee
Screen time impacts behavior
Smartphones interfere with relationships
Smartphones increase risk for anxiety and depression
Smartphones increase risk of cyber bullying
Smartphones expose children to sexual content
Increased social media use is linked to development of eating disorders
It remains to be seen how the smartphone and social media craze will affect Gen Z in the long run. However, parental intervention is crucial. Kids often relentlessly beg for things they perceive as social norms, so establishing a new norm of delaying smartphone use until later can help prevent them from feeling left out while allowing more time for their brains to develop healthily. For more insights on this topic, tune into this episode of Suburban Burnout.
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